Early in my career, I asked my mentor…
where I could go to learn about leadership. His answer was vague: “I hang around other leaders in our industry.”
That didn’t give me much of a roadmap—but it did bring Jim Rohn’s advice to life: “Never underestimate the power of association. Ask yourself: Who am I around, and what do they have me doing?” Tim was a living example of that wisdom.
He also gave me access to his educational library—back then it was CDs and cassette tapes. Yet I still walked away unclear on how to move forward.
A couple of weeks later, I stumbled into my first real lesson.
A Perplexing Problem
I was driving to go for an afternoon run and wrestling with a dilemma. An event was coming up that deserved celebration, and I wanted two people in my life to be there. The problem? They were locked in a bitter argument.
One of them was clearly more at fault, and I agonized over the decision:
- If I invited both, it could create tension.
- If I invited one and not the other, someone would feel excluded.
What was the right thing to do?
As I parked, I found myself dialing the phone. I left a voicemail for the person I was most conflicted about. I acknowledged the awkwardness of the situation and extended the invitation anyway. It was the right thing to do.
And when I hung up, it hit me: Who does that? Most people would have played it safe.
That was my “aha” moment. I was already a leader. I just hadn’t recognized it yet.
What Leadership Really Is
“Leadership is not a trumpet call to self-importance—it is the opportunity to serve.”
I had been viewing leadership through the wrong lens—chasing applause, recognition, and awards—the byproducts I had seen in my business heroes. What I missed was the truth: leadership isn’t about status. It’s about responsibility.
People were already watching me—sometimes copying, sometimes competing, sometimes criticizing. That’s the nature of leadership. Leaders gather information, weigh decisions, act boldly—and others watch closely.
Leaders Build People
Another trap many leaders fall into is this: because they’re so good at what they do, it often feels easier to just do the work themselves. Delegation feels inefficient.
But here’s the reality: leaders don’t grow until they grow others.
A true leader develops people to the point where they can be replaced. That’s not weakness—it’s wisdom. If you can’t raise someone up to step into your role, you’ll never rise into your next one. Leadership is not a zero-sum game.
A rising tide lifts all boats. When your people grow, you grow too. Leaders build people, and people build organizations.
Leadership Is Lonely
Here’s another truth: leadership can be lonely.
There’s very little competition at the top. The real struggle happens on the bottom rungs of the ladder. But once you’ve put in the work, earned the stripes, and proven yourself, most leaders at the top find themselves collaborating, sharing ideas, and sharpening one another.
After 40 years in this business, I can tell you: leadership is not about climbing to the top of the pile. It’s about stepping into the quiet responsibility of serving others—and recognizing you’ve been leading all along.
???? Reflection Questions for You:
- Who are you around, and how are they influencing you?
- Where in your life are you already leading, but not giving yourself credit?
- Who can you develop today so that both of you can rise tomorrow?